In many restaurants (i.e. family restaurants, chains) the server will absolutely not flirt with you. However, in many restaurants that is part of the expected atmosphere. It is even possible to get a steak at a strip club. Someone has a want and someone else chooses to provide the service. This is the free market.
Almost every restaurant/service runs a "comp tab", servers/bartenders/managers expect to give away a certain amount of goods to regulars and other good customers. Many sales jobs are 100% commission, which is priced into the sale. Tipping just exposes that commission to the customer. In any sale, sometimes commission has to be sacrificed for a difficult customer. The service industry is no different.
Almost every restaurant/service runs a "comp tab", servers/bartenders/managers expect to give away a certain amount of goods to regulars and other good customers. Many sales jobs are 100% commission, which is priced into the sale. Tipping just exposes that commission to the customer. In any sale, sometimes commission has to be sacrificed for a difficult customer. The service industry is no different.