I can't recommend this highly enough. Theres a conversation that can change your life for the better. No judgement, nothing to own up to or admit. Its the simplest thing once you press those buttons and say hello.
Do yourself a favour and use your voice for what it has been good at - talking to people. Give them a call. It really does get better.
I know I'm just some random person on the internet, but that's at least 1 person that thinks you have value :)